just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Dignity is for republicans.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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