Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
