he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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