your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
