I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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