hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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