Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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