Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize