I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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