girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
