your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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