By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize