i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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