Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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