...so i touched it.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Randomize
