somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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