I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
