FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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