Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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