did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
