I got chris browned last night
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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