Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
