No, drunk sperm still make babies.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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