so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Randomize
