How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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