Pappa wants mamma naked
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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