I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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