South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize