I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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