i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Dignity is for republicans.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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