I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
