i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
