What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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