At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
