Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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