He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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