Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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