Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
