I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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