Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize