Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
