I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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