I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
oh god was she eating orange peels again
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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