Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
This is the high leading the old right now
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
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