Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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