I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
