apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
