I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
