Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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