i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
