and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
